Every Day Is Different, And That’s Okay

In just eight months Harvey went from shutting himself in a darkened room to sitting three Maths papers – at school.

This achievement is phenomenal and an absolute testament to Harvey’s determination.

Understanding that determination doesn’t always looks the same, and taking time to discover what it looked like in Harvey was vital.  To the outside world he appeared unambitious, disinterested and unwilling to engage in education.  In fact, Harvey was overwhelmed, anxious and burnt out.  He needed someone to understand this, without having to provide an explanation.

We created a safe space which welcomes mistakes and questions.  Discovering that understanding was not solely Harvey’s responsibility, but rather a shared goal, was a real turning point.  I was not afraid to admit that sometimes my words get in a muddle.  Saying to Harvey after I’d explained something… ‘that didn’t make any sense, did it?!’… showed him not only that it was okay to get confused, but also that the fault in not understanding did not lie with him.  My job was to adapt my explanations to fit Harvey.  It was not his responsibility to adapt his learning to fit my teaching.

I recognised struggles in Harvey and understood how exhausting the neurotypical world can be.  Demands and expectations were kept low, but consistent.  Like myself, Harvey could find the pressure of achievement overwhelming.  Succeeding once immediately causes anxiety that this success must be maintained.  Constant reassurance was given that each moment is singular and being able to do something once, doesn’t create an expectation that it will be manageable every time.

When I first met Harvey he was in complete burnout, but given time and space, he was able to begin to rebuild his self-esteem.  “Sarah was an essential part of this recovery due to her calm and patient manner”.  It has been amazing to have been part of Harvey’s journey, even if it was only for a short time.  For me, his biggest achievement was getting into the school building to sit his three Maths exams.  But, on top of that, Harvey also managed to gain a Grade 4 in his Maths GCSE.